I have a hard time going to church when Hubband is gone. Our church is GREAT, loving, friendly, supportive, and our pastor's sermons are interesting and uplifting... but it is an hour's drive away. That isn't so bad, usually, but to drive that far and then sit alone and drive back again... for some reason it depresses me. Sometimes my friend Matthew and his girlfriend will go with me, or I'll go by myself, but when I woke up at 10 am this morning and realized that to make it to church after sleeping through the alarm I woul dhave to leave within 15 minutes I lost all drive. Instead, I listened the service of my college church over the internet. Turned out to be a good choice.
The speaker talked about how we, of all other creatures, were created with the right to CHOOSE and asked all of us to look at our own lives and choices and think about which ones we HAD made that we would change. Then he asked us to look at the choice to follow Christ and, for those who had already made it, asked if we would change it. He talked about the choices we make and how they always are accompnaied by consequences, both good and bad. While the bad ones may cause us to change our relationships on the human plane, how many of them have made us change our relationship with God? It got me thinking... and as I sang the old summer campfire worship songs in the shower (with a cat hiding under the shower curtain waiting to pounce on my ankles when I got out), I realized that of all the choices I have made in life, most of them have had SOMETHING good come out of them. Even the choices that led to my being date raped and not turning the guy in or even reporting it ended up leading me to New York City and that was one of the best choices of my life. If the rape hadn't happened, I may never have gotten the courage to leave a steady job and home with my sister and father nearby and go to a city where I knew only 2 people out of millions. My time in NYC taught me of myself, of courage, brought me contact with people who have shaped who I am, and brought me back in touch with the man I eventually married.
So many people go through adversity and turn their backs on God, blaming Him for all the wrong that has occurred, the horrors they experienced and had no part in bringing about. Someone else's choices foisted off on the innocent and bringing them sorrow. But what did that sorrow do in your life? That abusive relationship, or terrorist act, was not YOUR fault, YOU did not choose to have it take place in your life, but it DID... did you react by turning AWAY from Him? I think more people turn away during times of peace and prosperity...but that's just me.
What choices have you made? Have you ever looked back on those times and experiences and choices that you regret and traced them forward, learning how they have made you the woman or man you are today? Whether you believe it is just fate, destiny, happenstance, or God it is still interesting to trace the time- and event-line of our lives. For me, a believer in Christ and His sacrifice, it is amazing to see His hand in my life... I firmly believe that is He who leads us through the hard times, always there whether we acknowledge Him or not...
Even when Im singing in the shower, joyful that Life is good.